There's a child in my son's class named Bella. I truly love children, all children, and she's a challenge for me. Aidan likes her and considers her a friend, and yet. She's got a violent streak like nothing I've seen. I'm not often at school - I'm there every day, but for a few minutes at a time. I've witnesses her shrieking generally, shrieking unkind words, shoving down stairs, pushing, hitting, throwing things at other children. All this, and she's improving. Last year she chucked a chair at Nora's head, making a big egg and drawing blood.
I know that I don't understand what happens for someone else, in someone else's family or mind. I don't know what is going on for this child, other than I'm aware that she spends quite a bit of time at Children's Hospital. For what, I don't know. She appears healthy, but that's not an indicator, I've learned from my weekly volunteering at that same Children's Hospital. Her parents both seem lovely and clearly care for her dearly.
Why does Aidan continue to want to be friends with her, despite the fact that she hurts him several times a week? I don't know. Today he told me (unprovoked; I try not to say negative things about her, and I try to treat her like I treat the other children when I see her) about how she punched him in the face on the playground while he was climbing up the climber outside. He was afraid that she'd push him off and he'd fall to the ground. Late last week, she scratched his arm and drew blood. A couple of weeks ago, I hung out with them in the muscle room for a few minutes. She had her hands around his neck.
Last night, Aidan punched me in the face. That's not like him.
I've expressed concerns to his teachers, and today I started documenting the nearly daily incidents that he tells me about, unprovoked.