My husband jokes that the best way to get me to do something is to ask me not to do it. That's not really it, but this isn't about me. My husband also has a way in mind that things should be, and can be inflexible about other approaches. This isn't about him either, though.
My child will not - WILL NOT - do something he doesn't want to do. He doesn't care what the crowd's doing, what the group is doing, what the class is doing, what his friends are doing. If it seems like a good idea to him, then fine, but if not, no go. I think this will be a great asset when he's maybe a little less susceptible to peer pressure (though I'm not convinced it will be that way), but right now it can be a challenge.
We just spent a week in Mexico going to the pool every day. One might think that his swimming would improve, especially in the light of recent swim lessons. Nope. Not even a little. The child still won't jump into a pool, float on his back, get his head wet. We tried everything - encouragement, cajoling, a little bit sterm, making a game of it, bribery and thinly-veiled threats. That kid just isn't going to do something he doesn't want to do, and if you try to force it, you lose ground; you don't gain any. Your only hope is to make him think it was his idea, but that's no easy feat either.
'Sgonna be a handful.