In case I've been feeling a little big for my britches (no reference to Aidan's comment about my big bottom), how bad is this? I went maternity clothes shopping with my sister, and the girl at the shop asked if this would be my first grandbaby. My son's two! Granted, I could be a grandmother, but I would've conceived my sis at age 8. Ew. Also granted, she looks very, very young for her age, but to be her mom, I'd have to be an age that, while very acceptable to be is not acceptable for me to look, yet.
I told my hubby about it, and he asked if I punched her in the face. He was kinda mad. I love him!
My look of horror made her realize her error. She swears she heard my sis call me, "Mom." It's possible that she started a sentence with Mom, because we do talk about our mom. It's possible. It did feel a little like a sucker punch, though.
Friday, November 20, 2009
Monday, November 16, 2009
Nope. Nada. Not at all.
No Green Goblin - nothing. Not even the backup dragon costume. Not even the word, "costume." Nothing. Halloween was, for us, sitting on the front porch in street clothes eating various candies and trying to claw back into the house whenever trick-or-treaters who might be considered even slightly frightening dare to stop by.
In fact, today is significantly after our trick-or-treating day, Oct 29, and as we were leaving school today, he said, "I want to go to home. Let's go home. We're not going to the costume store?"
Ugh.
On the bright side, he's cracking me up. He's started saying phrases like, "so anyway, guys" and "actually."
In fact, today is significantly after our trick-or-treating day, Oct 29, and as we were leaving school today, he said, "I want to go to home. Let's go home. We're not going to the costume store?"
Ugh.
On the bright side, he's cracking me up. He's started saying phrases like, "so anyway, guys" and "actually."
just in case I need it
A friend was having a tough day, and I wrote this to her. As she's the only one who reads this besides me, I'm putting it here, somewhat at her advice, to remind myself when I need it. Know that I couldn't possibly love my family any more than I do, my stunning, gorgeous, loving and devoted husband and son.
so, every time i think i might be alone in my lonliness when i'm surrounded by love or in losing myself or in feeling ever so slightly ungrateful for what i'm so lucky, so so lucky to have, i realize that i'm not the only one in my shoes. it's all around me, every day, in women who are struggling to balance what's too much for any human to hold at once. there's no one right answer, no good answer, and everyone, EVERYONE with a family struggles with it, and everyone without a family wonders whether it'd all be better if she did. it's in our culture, it's in novels, it's in blogs, it's in elevator conversations; truly, it's everywhere.
you're beautiful in pretty much every way possible, and passionate about life and motherhood. you can't always get it all right, and i feel like maybe it wouldn't be as satisfying if you/we could. part of loving something is earning it, i believe. another part of loving it is letting myself not be perfect about it. why is it so easy for me to let other people be where they are, and understand where they're coming from, and so hard for me to let myself not be perfect? seriously, no one is. no one. No One.
i'm thinking about this a lot as my sis is expecting, and i'm hoping that she lets herself be where she is too.
don't get me wrong - i'm really very happy with my life and my gorgeous, beautiful son, and i'm sure you are too. it's just hard to be a mom sometimes. i don't know if this is helpful, but reading your blog today, i wanted to tell you this because it's all around me, sometimes affecting me personally and sometimes affecting friends or acquaintences. i'm sending a giant hug and a smile and the reassurance that you're right where you should be and that you're in there, plain for us all to see.
so, every time i think i might be alone in my lonliness when i'm surrounded by love or in losing myself or in feeling ever so slightly ungrateful for what i'm so lucky, so so lucky to have, i realize that i'm not the only one in my shoes. it's all around me, every day, in women who are struggling to balance what's too much for any human to hold at once. there's no one right answer, no good answer, and everyone, EVERYONE with a family struggles with it, and everyone without a family wonders whether it'd all be better if she did. it's in our culture, it's in novels, it's in blogs, it's in elevator conversations; truly, it's everywhere.
you're beautiful in pretty much every way possible, and passionate about life and motherhood. you can't always get it all right, and i feel like maybe it wouldn't be as satisfying if you/we could. part of loving something is earning it, i believe. another part of loving it is letting myself not be perfect about it. why is it so easy for me to let other people be where they are, and understand where they're coming from, and so hard for me to let myself not be perfect? seriously, no one is. no one. No One.
i'm thinking about this a lot as my sis is expecting, and i'm hoping that she lets herself be where she is too.
don't get me wrong - i'm really very happy with my life and my gorgeous, beautiful son, and i'm sure you are too. it's just hard to be a mom sometimes. i don't know if this is helpful, but reading your blog today, i wanted to tell you this because it's all around me, sometimes affecting me personally and sometimes affecting friends or acquaintences. i'm sending a giant hug and a smile and the reassurance that you're right where you should be and that you're in there, plain for us all to see.
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
not even the Green Goblin?
Trick or treat is tomorrow. Someone in our house, not to name names (Aidan) has been looking forward to this for months, talking about it, asking about it. He's insistent that he be the Green Goblin. (I should be the Hobgoblin - good luck with that.)
I can't remember whether I've mentioned his devotion to Spiderman, but it's nearly to the point of my brother's devotion to Star Wars at a tender age (completely unparalleled), and has come on earlier than I expected. His knowledge is daunting - all of Parker's (he calls him Parker usually, like they're pals) girlfriends, all of the villains, of course, and which person they "take" or wrong, everyone's history. I swear he has other activities than watching Spiderman, but there are days you can't tell by talking to him.
Hence, the insistence on the Green Goblin. I'm not sure whether any of you has tried lately to find a size 2T GG costume, but I promise that they don't exist. There's one but it's wrong. It's black with bits of green, and everyone knows that the real GG is green and purple. Check the cartoons. This leads to a wild goose chase in which I, who feels a little strapped for time on a regular basis, to put it kindly, find makings of a GG costume.
Last night, the pumpkins were finished and glowing on the front porch, and it was time to put the costume together. No go, my friends; no go. Shrieking, crying, hiding, and all sorts of avoidance ensued. It was as though I were torturing the child, and all I was trying to do was get a too-big shirt on him to make into the smocky-type thing that goes over the GG's green outfit. He doesn't want to Trick or Treat. He doesn't want to be the GG. He doesn't want candy. He wants to go to bed (that's a first). No GG. NO GG!
I believe Halloween's been cancelled at our house. We'll still pass out candy, and maybe someone will be inspired. I must say that my inspiration to create a costume was dimmed, and should he have a change of heart, there's a mighty fine ready-made dragon costume waiting in the wings for him. I believe that what actually will happen, though, is that I'll sit on the front porch and pass out candy to the vans full of kids who stop by (I live at the very edge of a very nice neighborhood that attracts vans full from surrounding slightly less safe neighborhoods) while a certain someone hides indoors from the scary kids in costume. Not what I pictured, but holidays are flexible, I suppose.
Wish us luck.
I can't remember whether I've mentioned his devotion to Spiderman, but it's nearly to the point of my brother's devotion to Star Wars at a tender age (completely unparalleled), and has come on earlier than I expected. His knowledge is daunting - all of Parker's (he calls him Parker usually, like they're pals) girlfriends, all of the villains, of course, and which person they "take" or wrong, everyone's history. I swear he has other activities than watching Spiderman, but there are days you can't tell by talking to him.
Hence, the insistence on the Green Goblin. I'm not sure whether any of you has tried lately to find a size 2T GG costume, but I promise that they don't exist. There's one but it's wrong. It's black with bits of green, and everyone knows that the real GG is green and purple. Check the cartoons. This leads to a wild goose chase in which I, who feels a little strapped for time on a regular basis, to put it kindly, find makings of a GG costume.
Last night, the pumpkins were finished and glowing on the front porch, and it was time to put the costume together. No go, my friends; no go. Shrieking, crying, hiding, and all sorts of avoidance ensued. It was as though I were torturing the child, and all I was trying to do was get a too-big shirt on him to make into the smocky-type thing that goes over the GG's green outfit. He doesn't want to Trick or Treat. He doesn't want to be the GG. He doesn't want candy. He wants to go to bed (that's a first). No GG. NO GG!
I believe Halloween's been cancelled at our house. We'll still pass out candy, and maybe someone will be inspired. I must say that my inspiration to create a costume was dimmed, and should he have a change of heart, there's a mighty fine ready-made dragon costume waiting in the wings for him. I believe that what actually will happen, though, is that I'll sit on the front porch and pass out candy to the vans full of kids who stop by (I live at the very edge of a very nice neighborhood that attracts vans full from surrounding slightly less safe neighborhoods) while a certain someone hides indoors from the scary kids in costume. Not what I pictured, but holidays are flexible, I suppose.
Wish us luck.
flattery will get you nowhere
Aidan walks by the bathroom as I'm getting in the shower:
"Mommy, that's your bottom."
"That's right."
"It's big."
Hmph.
"Mommy, that's your bottom."
"That's right."
"It's big."
Hmph.
Thursday, October 22, 2009
the bbb (big boy bed)
It's here - we have arrived.
We'd been thinking that the time might be coming soon. Then we had our hardwood floors redone, which caused us to move all of our earthly possessions into the garage or basement, including the crib. Disassembling a crib isn't as fun as one might think, and we decided that once apart, it wouldn't be reassembled in this house again, at least for this child. Off to my sister's for her little one due in March (yeah for her little one due in March!).
Aidan went from "camping" on his crib mattress on the basement floor to camping on his crib mattress on the floor of his room. I thought I knew what bed I wanted for him, but I searched and searched to find it at a decent price with no luck. Missed one on craigslist by two hours, wouldn't you know. After two weeks it started to be sad to go up and sing goodnight to him all stretched out on the floor. So, this was it. Called my folks this morning and asked them to help out in my husband's absence as he travels for work today.
I still have the twin-sized four poster bed I used until I was in my late 20s. I remember having it at all of our houses growing up, and also remember refinishing it with my dad and how proud I was of it. I loved that bed. After all these years, it's not in as beautiful shape - living in the garage for the last decade or so has done it no favors. We put together the old frame and then journeyed to the mattress store. Excellent sale - good to go in about 15 minutes flat with the mattresses in the van. Then off to find the most adorable bedset ever - it's got trains, planes, trucks - every type of vehicle. Perfect for a little man! His stuff was on clearance to boot, which for a bargain shopper like me was almost too much.
Now he's up sleeping soundly, holding on to Eeyore and his sheep, curled up happily in, under and around the planes, trains and trucks. He loves it.
We'd been thinking that the time might be coming soon. Then we had our hardwood floors redone, which caused us to move all of our earthly possessions into the garage or basement, including the crib. Disassembling a crib isn't as fun as one might think, and we decided that once apart, it wouldn't be reassembled in this house again, at least for this child. Off to my sister's for her little one due in March (yeah for her little one due in March!).
Aidan went from "camping" on his crib mattress on the basement floor to camping on his crib mattress on the floor of his room. I thought I knew what bed I wanted for him, but I searched and searched to find it at a decent price with no luck. Missed one on craigslist by two hours, wouldn't you know. After two weeks it started to be sad to go up and sing goodnight to him all stretched out on the floor. So, this was it. Called my folks this morning and asked them to help out in my husband's absence as he travels for work today.
I still have the twin-sized four poster bed I used until I was in my late 20s. I remember having it at all of our houses growing up, and also remember refinishing it with my dad and how proud I was of it. I loved that bed. After all these years, it's not in as beautiful shape - living in the garage for the last decade or so has done it no favors. We put together the old frame and then journeyed to the mattress store. Excellent sale - good to go in about 15 minutes flat with the mattresses in the van. Then off to find the most adorable bedset ever - it's got trains, planes, trucks - every type of vehicle. Perfect for a little man! His stuff was on clearance to boot, which for a bargain shopper like me was almost too much.
Now he's up sleeping soundly, holding on to Eeyore and his sheep, curled up happily in, under and around the planes, trains and trucks. He loves it.
Thursday, September 24, 2009
Not so much a lollipop
There's a big dirt pile behind Aidan's school put there every summer so the kids can play in it - they dig, they find worms, they play with trucks - they're kids in it (I really love Aidan's school). When I picked him up, he'd clearly been playing in the dirt pile - black dirt head to toe - and as I drove home, he started talking to me from the back seat.
"I take my shoes off, Mommy."
"OK Aidan, just throw them on the floor."
"My feet are really dirty." (True - pretty well solid black)
"That's right; we'll take a bath when we get home."
"My feet are really, really dirty."
"I know - it's okay. That's why we have a bathtub."
(As I hear giggling and see a foot moving in the rear view mirror) "Let's lick it!"
He's definitely a boy!
"I take my shoes off, Mommy."
"OK Aidan, just throw them on the floor."
"My feet are really dirty." (True - pretty well solid black)
"That's right; we'll take a bath when we get home."
"My feet are really, really dirty."
"I know - it's okay. That's why we have a bathtub."
(As I hear giggling and see a foot moving in the rear view mirror) "Let's lick it!"
He's definitely a boy!
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